Bob Schwartz

Tag: joke

If you buy the premise, you’ll buy the bit

“If you buy the premise, you’ll buy the bit” is a maxim of humor and joke telling. “A guy goes to a psychiatrist and says…” or “A priest, a minister, and a rabbi are sitting at a bar…” are setups for a joke. Someone who doesn’t buy that premise (someone of limited imagination, because it’s just a joke) will never get the joke.

This extends to logical argument in general. Without believing in a premise, the rest of the argument, like the rest of the joke, goes nowhere.

Sometimes the premise is hidden, incidentally or intentionally, and sometimes it is assumed without analysis and investigation. This is a reminder to find the premise, consider it carefully, and decide whether to buy it.

To close less seriously, with a ridiculous premise, one of my favorite jokes.


A guy goes to a psychiatrist.

Guy says, “Doc, my brother thinks he’s a chicken.”

Psychiatrist says, “Bring him in and I’ll examine him.”

Guy says, “I would, but we need the eggs.”


Best Cartoon Ever

Two Guys on an Elephant

Following is the best cartoon I have ever seen. Excuse the low quality, because it is a scan of an old and precious magazine clipping.

You could write a doctoral dissertation on how these four panels work their magic and represent the art and mechanics of humor. Or you could just laugh.

Black and White Prints from the British Museum

 

Duck Walks Into A Drugstore

I posted one of my favorite jokes more than two years ago. Because I thought we all needed a laugh. In case you weren’t around, here it is again. Because we definitely need a laugh.

Duck walks into a drugstore, asks for some Chap Stick. Guy behind the counter says, “That’ll be fifty-nine cents.” Duck says, “Put it on my bill.”

Next day, the duck walks into the drugstore, asks for a package of condoms. Guy behind the counter says, “Would you like me to put that on your bill?” Duck says, “Hey, what kind of a duck do you think I am?”

Joke Break: Duck Walks into a Drugstore…

Duck Drug Store
We need a break. So here’s one in a continuing series of jokes from the joke file, a well-traveled manila folder containing about three pounds of clippings and copies from all kinds of sources.

This doesn’t mean that there aren’t stupid, tragic and completely unnecessary things going on in this country and the world. That’s exactly what’s going on—but we still have to live. And laugh.

Great jokes don’t have to offend sensibilities, but they sometimes do. So a blanket apology in advance if you are put off or offended—or if you don’t find a particular joke very funny.

 

Duck walks into a drugstore, asks for some Chap Stick. Guy behind the counter says, “That’ll be fifty-nine cents.” Duck says, “Put it on my bill.”

Next day, the duck walks into the drugstore, asks for a package of condoms. Guy behind the counter says, “Would you like me to put that on your bill?” Duck says, “Hey, what kind of a duck do you think I am!”