Bob Schwartz

Dread Pirate Donald

“We’re like pirates. We’re sort of like pirates.”

On May 1, 2026, Donald Trump spoke at The Forum Club in West Palm Beach. Rambling wildly for over an hour, he excitedly described the Navy actions in Iran: “We’re like pirates. We’re sort of like pirates.”

In normal times, whenever that was, the president proudly claiming America acted like pirates would be big news. First, because if we are engaging in piracy, that is not something you proudly announce. Second, piracy is a breach of international law, which is why you don’t announce. There were some mentions, images and cartoons, but it was not big news. Quick coverage, then on to the next instability, incompetence and insanity.

It did offer a creative opportunity.

Below is an excerpt from the speech. And since pirates were a theme, I’ve recreated what that rhetoric would sound like if recited by a pirate, who I’ve named Dread Pirate Donald. Please enjoy.

And when you look at the Hormuz Strait and you see all of those ships, all of those people and ships, they want to get out or they want to get in. They’re all over the place. They’re like little ants, right? They look like a little anthill, and hundreds and hundreds of ships. And we have a navy that is unbelievable. We put up, it’s a blockade. It’s a blockade. But you saw him saying, uh, we have guns trained on your ship, turn your ship around, turn — and this is loudspeakers that go over the ocean and they hear them from two miles away. Turn your ship around, turn your ship around, and all of a sudden, you hear, yes, yes, we are going back to Iran, we are going back. We have such great military and great navy. And they were going straight through. And they said, turn your ship around, and there was no response. Turn your ship around, evacuate your engine room immediately. And you see all these guys running out of there. Now, they’re five miles away and one shot into the engine room, blew up the engine room, the ship stopped, that ship. They use tugboats and then we landed on top of it. On top of everything else, we then land on top of it and we took over the ship. We took over the cargo, took over the oil. It’s a very profitable business. Who would have thought we were doing that? We’re like pirates. We’re sort of like pirates.
–Donald Trump, May 1, 2026

Leave a comment

May 4, 2026

Full moon tries

Full moon tries.

Leave a comment

May 4, 2026

Netanyahu Scapegoats the Palestinians for Holocaust (2015)

The post below was originally published on October 21, 2015, more than ten years ago.

In 2026, it can be hard to remember all the dangerous and mendacious absurdities that have been inflicted on us, since they come at us so fast and furious every day. Yet some absurdities promoted not so long ago are worth remembering, particularly if they reflect on current leaders and current atrocities.

Netanyahu blamed the Holocaust on the Palestinians. Maybe he still does.

Trump is mentioned in the post, even though he was not yet president, and in fact was being vilified at the time by his Republican opponents as an immoral nut case. Some of those opponents became his most loyal supporters and even joined his cabinet.

Netanyahu and Trump are very much still with us, spouting lies and inflicting pain with impunity.

The more things change…

The Jews killed Jesus. The Palestinians started the Holocaust. So who’s the scapegoat now?

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu says that in the early days leading up to World War II, Hitler visited the Grand Mufti of Jerusalem, and it was that Palestinian leader who came up with the idea of the Final Solution:

“Hitler didn’t want to exterminate the Jews at the time, he wanted to expel the Jews. And Haj Amin al-Husseini went to Hitler and said, ‘If you expel them, they’ll all come here.’ ‘So what should I do with them?’ he asked. He said, ‘Burn them.’

Historians have already weighed in heavily on how historically bogus this is, given that, among other things, Hitler published Mein Kampf three years before that meeting. The assertion has been described as “jaw-dropping”, with even friendly politicians “agog” at this dark nonsense.

Just when you thought it was the Jews who have for centuries been scurrilously blamed for every terrible thing, Netanyahu goes and turns the tables and scapegoats somebody else. Not just any somebody else. The enemy within and on the borders, the one that you could happily live without.

It appears that the very unpopular Prime Minister is trying to take lessons from Donald Trump, with whom he shares the kinship of attending Wharton. The strategy: Demonize those unwanted immigrants and/or natives. Say anything, no matter how incendiary, explosive, ridiculous or unrelated to fact about the enemies within, and people will love it. And you.

Just one glitch. Trump doesn’t lead a nation at the center of global conflict; actually he doesn’t lead any nation at all. And if America has a history of scapegoating, which it does (take your pick among religious, cultural, political and ethnic groups), it doesn’t compare in long-term viciousness to what the Jews have endured.

Starting, of course, with the big one. In fact, if you look closely at Netanyahu’s indictment, it is not that the Palestinians actually ran the death camps. They just planted the idea, whispering in the ear of an emperor, who was happy to carry out the deed. This time a German emperor, instead of Roman one.

Who’s the scapegoat now?

Leave a comment

May 3, 2026

One mistake after another

Shoshaku jushaku. Literally, to use a file to file a file.

I first discovered the idea of shoshaku jushaku–one continuous mistake–a long time ago in talks by Shunryu Suzuki Roshi (see below). I may understand it a little better, just a little better, now, as I’ve made and experienced many more of what I considered mistakes, by me and others, one after another.

We seem to be witnessing so many public and harmful mistakes right now, which is how the phrase “one mistake after another” came to mind. We may point out constructively things that could be done or said better and offer corrections. But when we get mired in judgments about mistakes, we bring ourselves and others down. As Dogen wrote, “We should understand that, in reality, mistakes are called learning.” And as Suzuki Roshi said:

“So we should not say, “This is good,” or “This is bad.” Instead of saying bad, you should say, “not-to-do”!”

“When we reflect on what we are doing in our everyday life, we are always ashamed of ourselves. One of my students wrote to me saying, “You sent me a calendar, and I am trying to follow the good mottoes which appear on each page. But the year has hardly begun, and already I have failed!” Dogen-zenji said, “Shoshaku jushaku.” Shaku generally means “mistake” or “wrong.” Shoshaku jushaku means “to succeed wrong with wrong,” or one continuous mistake. According to Dogen, one continuous mistake can also be Zen. A Zen master’s life could be said to be so many years of shoshaku jushaku. This means so many years of one single-minded effort.”

–Shunryu Suzuki, Zen Mind Beginner’s Mind

“We should understand that, in reality, mistakes are called learning, and the state of no mistake is called nowness. In nowness there is no before or after, no goals, agendas, or fixed direction. Like the meandering river, it twists and turns in accord with circumstances but always knows how to find its way to the great ocean. If you wish to travel like this, you must go alone, not carry any baggage, and trust yourself implicitly.”

–Dogen, The True Dharma Eye

Leave a comment

May 1, 2026

Law Day: Critical times are tough tests for lawyers. Some pass, some fail.

May 1, as I’ve mentioned in other posts today, is Law Day.

I’ve written frequently about the role of lawyers in the first Trump administration and during the attempts to deny that Trump lost the 2020 election (which six years later are still ongoing). None of the lawyers involved in that administration have been sanctioned, but a few of those who lied and promoted baseless election denial have lost their licenses to practice. As noted below, lawyers are officers of the court and are held to very high standards of professional ethics and responsibility.

Any contemporary discussion of miscreant presidential lawyers always brings us back to Watergate. The post below was originally published in October 2017 during the first year of that first Trump administration. It is safe to say that the current Trump lawyers make the lawyers of that first administration, where there was a semblance of upholding the rule of law, look like legal angels. The Watergate lawyers were no angels, and as one of the linked posts chronicles, they paid the price, with jail and professional sanctions.

Lawyers are sworn officers of the courts of their respective states and federal jurisdictions. They take a solemn oath. They take that oath because as citizens we give them substantial power as officers of the court. As Spiderman (not a lawyer) reminds us, with great power comes great responsibility.

In normal times it is hard enough for lawyers to balance all the interests surrounding them—professional, personal, political. In abnormal and critical times—like these—lawyers may be pushed to pick a lane. The onerous professional demands, as embodied in the oath, may be in conflict with other interests, including ambition, success and ideology.

In previous posts, I’ve mentioned a few examples of times in which lawyers chose poorly. One is the case of attorneys involved in Watergate, almost two dozen of whom ended up being punished and sanctioned. Another is Hans Frank, a brilliant attorney known as Hitler’s Lawyer. There are many other infamous examples.

The number of lawyers involved in current events, as principals or as advocates, is growing exponentially. It will only expand as dark matters surrounding the president get deeper and more serious. Please keep this in mind as this drama unfolds.

Here is an example of an oath, one taken by attorneys in the State of Washington:

OATH OF ATTORNEY

I do solemnly declare:

I am fully subject to the laws of the State of Washington and the laws of the United States and will abide by the same.

I will support the constitution of the State of Washington and the constitution of the United States.

I will abide by the Rules of Professional Conduct approved by the Supreme Court of the State of Washington.

I will maintain the respect due to the courts of justice and judicial officers.

I will not counsel, or maintain any suit, or proceeding, which shall appear to me to be unjust, or any defense except as I believe to be honestly debatable under the law, unless it is in defense of a person charged with a public offense. I will employ for the purpose of maintaining the causes confided to me only those means consistent with truth and honor. I will never seek to mislead the judge or jury by any artifice or false statement.

I will maintain the confidence and preserve inviolate the secrets of my client, and will accept no compensation in connection with the business of my client unless this compensation is from or with the knowledge and approval of the client or with the approval of the court.

I will abstain from all offensive personalities, and advance no fact prejudicial to the honor or reputation of a party or witness unless required by the justice of the cause with which I am charged.

I will never reject, from any consideration personal to myself, the cause of the defenseless or oppressed, or delay unjustly the cause of any person.

Leave a comment

May 1, 2026

Labor, Loyalty and Law Day

It is May 1, and there is no Google Doodle for it. Maybe because it is hard for Google to know exactly which May 1 holiday to celebrate. Or maybe Google does not want to be involved in any controversy that the different May Days might engender.

May Day has been for ages a universal celebration of spring, with sprightly traditions including dancing around the Maypole. Then it took a darker, more serious turn, becoming International Workers’ Day (Labor Day), a commemoration of the bloody death of workers at the Haymarket Riot in Chicago in 1886. To counter this populist/communistic direction, in 1921 it became Loyalty Day (originally Americanization Day), with Congress and President Eisenhower officially affirming this in 1959 at the height of the Cold War. Almost simultaneously, in 1958 the President also declared May 1 to be Law Day.

May Day remains all this and whatever else you choose to make of it. Consider these virtues: the importance of labor and economic justice, the value of deserved loyalty, the significance of the rule of law, and the joys of spring that make all of them worthwhile. If you miss May 1, May 2 or every other day will do for working on all these and for dancing, with or without a Maypole.

Leave a comment

May 1, 2026

May 1: International Workers’ Day (aka May Day)

May 1 represents three different things, depending on who and where you are.

For ages it has been a celebration of spring, including dancing around the Maypole.

It is International Workers’ Day, a labor holiday celebrated around the world, where it is sometimes known simply as Labor Day.

It is Law Day in America.

The spring thing is obvious. International Workers’ Day and Law Day require a little history.

In 1886, a general labor strike was planned for May 1 in Chicago, to promote adoption of the 8-hour work day. It is estimated that 300,000 or more showed up in Chicago, and thousands more around America. A further demonstration was planned for Chicago’s Haymarket Square a few days later on May 4. Clashes there between police and anarchists led to death and destruction, in what is called the Haymarket Square Riot. Nine defendants were arrested for their alleged involvement, and six were ultimately hanged. Since then, May 1 has been International Workers’ Day.

In 1921, at the height of America’s first Red Scare, May 1 was designated Loyalty Day. Then in 1957, during another Red Scare, President Eisenhower declared May 1 Law Day, a celebration of the rule of law—something America needs now as much as ever.

Take your choice on May 1: Celebrate spring, celebrate workers, celebrate the rule of law. Why not all three?

Leave a comment

May 1, 2026

May Day, Mayday!

May 1 is a very busy day.

It has been for ages a celebration of spring, with traditions including dancing around the Maypole.

It is International Workers’ Day, a labor holiday around the world. The date was set to commemorate the tragic Haymarket Riot in Chicago in 1886.

In 1921, to neutralize the socialist/communist aspects, in America it became known as Loyalty Day (originally Americanization Day). Congress and President Eisenhower officially affirmed this in 1959 at the height of the Cold War.

In 1958 President Eisenhower declared May 1 to also be Law Day.

What’s sometimes overlooked is the coincidental similarity to the international radio distress call: Mayday! Mayday! This was reportedly first used in the 1920s by pilots in France. One story has it that it comes from the French “venez m’aidez” (come help me).

Is it just a coincidence? If you are a worker, or a lawyer, or someone who feels put upon by law or lawyers, or just about anybody feeling distressed on May 1, 2026, please feel free to say it loud. Though dancing helps too.

Leave a comment

April 30, 2026

Freud and Freund

Some dreams are literal or nearly so. Sometimes riding a roller coast is just riding a roller coaster. Some dreams, if you take a symbolic and analytical approach, mean more and say more than the action they depict. That roller coaster might be the story of your day or your life.

The rarest kind are wholly, or at least momentarily, conceptual and intellectual. That is, they are like reading a text or listening to a lecture, wherein an item is dictated or a point is announced.

I was asked in a dream to play a word game, to relate two words. It wasn’t quite a request, it was more like a reveal, as in “Look, don’t you see?”

The words were Freud and Freund (the German word for friend). I did not take this to mean that Freud is my friend. I took it to mean that analysis and investigation, which Freud is famous or infamous for, is/can be/may be near the heart of friendship. Friends may not want this or like this, we may not want to do this or complicate the joyful simplicity of a relationship, but it does happen.

Of course, Freud might find the dream and my interpretation of it…interesting. He might expect me to delve more deeply into why he made it into the dream at all, even if only as a name, and why in my dream I was playing word games instead of, say, riding a roller coaster or something equally thrilling. But then, I might ask him, as my freund, to kindly shut up and let me get back to sleep.

Leave a comment

April 30, 2026

The Democratic Party needs a new animal

The Democratic Party has not been at its best during the first year of the current Republican administration. Tragically unfortunate, since it is one of only two parties that govern America, and the only one in a position to stop the slide into Republican authoritarian tyranny. It is not enough to be better than the Republican Party. Courage, vision, action and leadership are called for, and, acknowledging some admirable examples, these have been in short supply among Democrats.

It isn’t an entire solution, but I think the Democratic animal must change.

Donkeys are worthy animals for some purposes. But as a Democratic leader and politician, does your looking at a donkey really inspire you? Does it really say what this moment desperately needs?

Here are two suggestions for the Democrats: Buffalo/American bison and grizzly bear.

Buffalo is a great Democratic choice for a few reasons. It is mighty, resilient and quintessentially American. As a bonus, it resonates with the story of our native people. Of course, America did not hesitate to almost extinguish buffalo, showing disregard for those native people and wildlife. Republicans, in their infinite hypocritical absurdity, will try to say that the Democratic choice of buffalo is both mockery of a great American symbol and too woke.

Grizzly bear is also a great choice. If you want to project and inspire toughness, with the prospect of inflicting a beat down, not many animals are its equal. Certainly not donkeys.

Which should the Democratic Party be, the party of the buffalo or the party of the grizzly bear?

Leave a comment